ST. MARY’S CHURCH ON VERNON BLVD TO BE DEMOLISHED FOR TOWER

The iconic St. Mary’s Church on Vernon Boulevard will be knocked down to make way for a luxury residential tower according to plans filed with the NYC Department of Buildings yesterday.  The proposal calls for a 62-story “pinner” building – one that’s very tall and very narrow – with many of the apartments full-floor 4-bedrooms with keyed access.  According to the developer Ronald Plum of the Plum Organization, it is meant to be a counterpart in the LIC skyline to 432 Park Avenue in Manhattan.

In return for zoning variances and low-interest financing from the city, half the apartments will be set aside as affordable housing.  The ground floor will contain retail establishments, and since the views will be minimal at the lower level, floors 2-4 will be set aside for over-the-top amenities including an indoor pool filled with heated glacial water, a free always-on-call masseuse, a virtual reality playroom and an endangered small-animal petting zoo for kids, and a “grow-your-own” hydroponic garden.

“These are the things that young people want nowadays” said Mr. Plum in an interview, “and there’s absolutely no reason they shouldn’t have them.”  “In addition, we’re going to bring the best of Times Square to Long Island City, with the premiere opening of a dual-concept restaurant that we think will soon be nationwide: Bubba Gump’s Olive Garden.”

Mr. Plum went on to state “Given the emotional attachment1 to the parcel we’re looking to develop, I know this proposal will generate a lot of controversy.  But let’s face it people, real estate worship has replaced religion in the lives of Americans in the 21st Century.  I know this for a fact.”   Finally, he finished triumphantly by proclaiming “With non-recourse financing for myself and unparalleled luxury living for those selected in the affordable housing lottery, what’s the downside?  This is a win-win for everyone!”

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New Paint Applied to Old Building on 47th Drive – according to the LIC Post

1. Less than half a century ago, the southern tip of Long Island City was still referred to as St. Mary’s Parish by both residents and the press [↩]